1. Too much ice cream = bloated lactose intolerance or weight gain
2. Too much time on the computer = blurred vision, head-ache, lack of exercise
3. Too much television = lack of real life
4. Too much work = not enough play
5. Too much sex = Wait a minute! is there such a thing?

 Which leads me to my next query…

Are there actions in life that are never too much? (pardon the double negative) For example, can you ever have too much education, tolerance, or customer service?  I feel safe saying no to all three instances.

I believe strongly in higher and continuing education. After graduating at age 44 with an MBA, I realized it is never too late to learn something. As a society, we lack a great enough capacity to accept those different from ourselves and could use a heavier dose of tolerance.

Last on the list is customer service. I am considered a customer experience maven, and I can’t imagine anyone believing they are receiving excessive service.

Here is where I was wrong! Recently I heard from a colleague that someone complained she was over-serviced by sales associates who “asked her random questions.” In other words, in the off chance of building a relationship and enhance the experience, the sales people were trying to engage the customer. Coming from a bridal background, I am familiar with and successfully utilize a very personalized service approach.

Where is the line drawn between nagging and assistance?

There are always two sides to every story. It is certainly possible that in the associates quest to aid the client:

1. He overstepped boundaries by attempting to become too familiar or inappropriate with the customer.
2. He misread the customer’s cues and didn’t let her shop in peace.
3. His selling style was too aggressive for this customer.
4. He was inauthentic and fake, which turned her off.
5. He tried too hard and came off as desperate for a sale.
6. He was snooty to the customer.
7. He wasn’t snooty enough.

Lesson learned: level of service is relative

Just because I prefer extensive customer service does not mean everyone else does too. My advice is that when first setting out to work with a client, set out to understand his/her service needs from the start.

She may be a window shopper, or prefer not to engage in conversation with you. She may be looking for something in particular and be in a hurry to get on with her day, and not have/make time for small talk. Maybe you have spinach between your teeth and she can’t stop staring.

Know that it may not be you, but it might. Don’t take it personally. Instead, use it as an opportunity to broaden your skills. Understanding the difference between service and disservice is difficult but not impossible.

What level of service are you comfortable receiving? Have you ever had a salesperson go too far in the name of customer service. Share your stories and experiences.

Related articles

• Who Is Hiding Your ‘Customers’ Part 3 (translatescotland.com)
• “How May I Help You?”: Customer Service Positions do a Disservice to Women (lachristagreco.com)
• Why Just Service Customers When You Can Engage Them? (community.constantcontact.com)
• Ehsan Khodarahmi: Customer Service Is the New PR (huffingtonpost.com)
• Knockout Customer Service Rule #5 (knockoutcustomerservice.com)

• Why Just Service Customers When You Can Engage Them? (community.constantcontact.com)
• Ehsan Khodarahmi: Customer Service Is the New PR (huffingtonpost.com)
• Knockout Customer Service Rule #5 (knockoutcustomerservice.com)

Happy 21st Birthday baby!

In yesterday’s building fierce loyalty in 28days post Shelly Kramer reminded me that in order to gain one’s loyalty, you have to earn it by being human, fallible and humble. Even superheros practice some form of humility in that they usually keep a secret identity so they can assimilate into society.

My personal voyage into humility

Today (February 7) is my daughter Avery’s 21st birthday. Avery is an amazing girl woman who has achieved several life changing milestones including: her Bat Mitzvah, High School Graduation, and soon (May 2013) college graduation as well. She never ceases to amaze me with her poise and grace.

In my eyes, there is nothing more humbling than realizing that your children are now adults and that YOU are not immortal. How is she getting older without me also aging in the process? The reality is that she can’t and I subsequently continue to mature a little more every year!

Rather than being egocentric and worrying about my own mortality, I look at Avery and know that I had something to do with why she is so special. I didn’t tell everyone what a great mom I am. There are times when I think my parental skills lack discipline, but as Shelly so eloquently put it to me, the proof is in the pudding.

Maybe this is the same reason I have become a trusted editor to my friends and coworkers. People know that I am not full of crap and will not ever lie by my actions rather than by my resume.

lesson learned: I am enough

Back in my therapy days, I discovered my personal lie was that I am somehow not enough and unworthy (which incidentally I don’t consider being humble). As a result I try extra hard to please those around me. Through personal growth I realized that I am enough as I am and that my amazing children are proof of it.

What single thing has humbled you? How did you react? Share yourself to the world (and this blog) with your thoughts and stories,

As I sit here thinking about my latest adventure into a group trying to escape mediocrity, I think of several questions. What are the ingredients to success? Why do some achieve while others fail? Now that my goal of finishing a higher education is complete what will be next?

My head is swimming (but not with the mermaids yet) with opportunities, mischief and tied down by responsibility. Some adventures will wait until my youngest (14 year old Sam) is ready to let me go. An exercise prescribed by Sarah Robinson, creator and facilitator of Escaping Mediocrity, is to list 5 people who prevent me from pursuing
what I desire. Next I describe precisely what these people are keeping me from in the first place.

I don’t blame others for my insecurities. They surely exist but for the most part  originate from fear of abandonment and/or rejection. So, instead I wanted to simply skip to part 3 of the exercise and list what I really want to achieve in the next 6-12 months.

another great adventure

1. I want to spend more quality time with my family.
2. I want to travel more and work less, while still earning an income.
3. I want to exercise regularly
4. I want to grow professionally.
5. I want to blog more.

It was more intense than I expected thinking of and writing this list. Now that it is officially listed, it is time for strategy and action. If I were able to choose one desire off the list that spoke to me the loudest it is a combination of 1 and 2. If I were able to work less and travel more, I would also have more time to spend with my family. I believe these come hand in hand.

Step one completed

Each day I am participating in a new exercise in order to escape mediocrity. Join me on this journey of self discovery. What is on your list and what is stopping you from doing it? Share your thoughts and stories.

Related articles

• Building a “Fiercely Loyal” Community (thesadcafecommunity.wordpress.com)

Image via Wikipedia

Is there a difference between friends in the virtual world and the real world? A year ago, I would have thought absolutely. After all, my virtual friends consisted of people who would fertilize my crops on Farmville (my one year Farmville free anniversary is coming up). Now the difference between real and fantasy is becoming blurred as I am drawn to the desert in a mer-skirt.

My life will never be the same.

I just spent the past few days with a great friend I met through LinkedIn about a year ago. We connected through a sales group, later becoming friends on Facebook and Twitter. She is also a blogging tribal sister and part of my team #kloutjuice silliness. I don’t consider her less of a friend because we only met face to face three days ago.

My new friend Pam founded the Floatli Mermaid Institute Camp based in Tucson Arizona but soon to be making its arrival at Desert Hot Springs, California. The name of the event is Mermaids in the Desert and it takes place April Fools weekend 2012.

Yes I said the word mermaid with a straight face.

I don’t like to swim, never mind float, but the idea of releasing my inner mermaid, in my case Lobster Queen, is irresistible. So, I donned my new siren-red sequined mer skirt provided by mermaid Shelly of Shell Tail Labs and did a PR photo shoot with Pamela and her sidekick mermaid Molly at La Costa.

Pam put her heart and soul into this event and I am proud to be affiliated with it. For anyone interested in attending (whether you are in the real or virtual world) please find the event on Facebook or through the link in this post.

Lesson learned: there is nothing in this world that is too silly to do.

Traditionally, this blog is not about shameless promotion, but this is too worthy of a cause to pass up. We all need to let go of reality even if it is only for a weekend in the desert. Stop taking yourself so seriously and jump in, the water will be warm and the mer-skirts will be flashy. All that is missing is YOU!

Mermaid Miriam awaits

Related articles

• Sea The Wackiness at the Mermaid Parade (bellasugar.com)

Surrounded by loss, it can be difficult to find a bright point. There seems to be no end in sight to the financial conundrum we find ourselves in. Houses in Reno line the streets with various for sale signs. I know several people who have turned their keys in and walked away from their homes as values dropped by more than half.

wait there is more…

Reno/Tahoe is known as a winter recreational destination. We boast some of the West’s premier ski resorts in the country. To top it all off, there is no snow in the Sierra’s = no skiing = hurts economy even more. Also it is a total bummer when you bought a season’s pass and haven’t been on the mountain yet this year (actually we bought 4; one for each of us).

what lies ahead?

My daughter is currently a junior in college. What opportunity awaits her upon graduation? It is not sufficient to achieve merely a bachelors degree for many professions. Does this mean we will have to support her indefinitely while she continues her education? Probably.

The good news is that by the time she is finally done, the economy should not be so bleak. There is still hope for her future. My own education is a bi-product of the flailing economy as well. Is it really a bad thing when hard times means you take the time to work on yourself?

lesson learned: there is still joy to be found

I may complain about the current situation (especially the total lack of snow!), but the reality is that it can also be a highly productive time for personal growth. In place of snow sports, we are cycling (weird as it is) through the winter months. We can still be active regardless of the weather.

When the housing bubble was at its height a few years back, we decided to stay put in a home we could afford and were comfortable in. Thankfully, my family is in a better financial place because of our restraint. We recently purchased a new home with nearly double the living space of our old one for a bargain price.

I find joy in simple pleasures like enjoying a bottle of wine with friends. Staying home with my husband and kids watching a bad movie on Netflixis a favorite pastime of mine. Blogging has given me a wonderful outlet for spilling my guts. Knowing that when I get up in the morning I am fortunate enough to have a job that I love is joyous as well.

the 3 banana girls enjoying ourselves at Starbucks

It is through adversity that we find out what we are really made of. What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger. I don’t remember who originally told me that gem. As a kid, I used to hate it when people told me this. In my adult form, I finally understand its true meaning. What has tested your capacity to find joy? What did you learn about yourself through the process? Share your thoughts and stories.

Related articles

• Computer glitch delays Nevada jobless benefits (seattletimes.nwsource.com)
• Is Nevada recovering? Depends on who you ask (sfgate.com)
• Is Nevada Recovering? Depends on Who You Ask (abcnews.go.com)
• Sierra resorts wait for snow as Christmas nears (seattletimes.nwsource.com)
• Reno Can Do Better (10march2004.wordpress.com)

Here’s an excerpt:

A San Francisco cable car holds 60 people. This blog was viewed about 3,600 times in 2011. If it were a cable car, it would take about 60 trips to carry that many people.

Click here to see the complete report.

looking in the mirror

I am your mirror

In essence, we all want the same things; comfort, food and attention. We relish seeing ourselves reflected from within our surroundings. Whether it is found in the clothes we wear, level of education, chosen profession, where we live or method of transportation (i.e. do you drive a Mercedes or a Hyundai?), we are revealing part of ourselves to the world. All of this and more is known, understood and accepted throughout society.

What I don’t comprehend is how people seem to dissociate from their mirror images when it comes to behavior. They act a certain way, then take no responsibility for their actions. Do these people think we no longer notice their reflections as they rant about things that should remain within their control?

SWI (shopping while intoxicated)

Recently, I read an article in Retail Wire about the perils of drinking while taking to computers for retail therapy. SWI is certainly safer than driving an automobile while intoxicated. By itself, the practice seems harmless as more consumers make online purchases.

It becomes a problem when the shopper habitually purchases online only to regret it the next day when the buzz has worn off, promptly returning all merchandise to the online retailer or worse yet a brick and mortar counterpart. Maybe there should be a public service announcement where the message is, “don’t let friends shop drunk.”

time to take another peek in the mirror

Understandably, people buy things and then suffer from remorse. Sometimes they return product while others simply hoard it (another topic altogether). The fit may be wrong if it is apparel or perhaps the item may not be as it appears online. I really don’t have issues with consumers who don’t wish to keep everything they purchase. Things happen/change, no big whoop.

The behavior I can’t stand is when a customer tries to deflect accountability for his/her poor judgment by blaming the e-retailer for a shopping addiction. In many years of retail management, I have seen customers become abusive when a return cannot be processed because of a thrown out or misplaced invoice or cannot return special orders once shipped.  With a thunderous shout, he expects everyone to bend to his will and disregard all policy and procedure.

I am not sure there is anyone to blame for SWI. Is it really necessary to accuse either party for irresponsible spending? Rampant accountability avoidance can be found everywhere. The economy is still slow and people continue losing jobs and homes. Companies as well as individuals who can afford it the most, sit on mounds of cash, failing to help boost the flow of money. Is there any wonder that some choose to escape for a little while by shopping online with money they cannot afford to spend?

Share your thoughts about SWI or shopping in general. What do you do to elude depression?

Related articles

• 5 Ways Drunk Shopping Could Put Your Finances On The Rocks (businessinsider.com)
• Online app retailer launches a real-world store (springwise.com)
• Is online retailers killing the “Brick and Mortar” stores? (lovehateandmarketing.com)
• Holidays can fuel shopping addiction for some (seattletimes.nwsource.com)
• Online retailers’ latest target: The tipsy (news.cnet.com)
• Shopping While Intoxicated nets online gains (msnbc.msn.com)
• Why Do Shoppers Bother With More Than Few Successful Online Stores? (essayboard.com)
• NYT: Shopping While Intoxicated nets online gains (msnbc.msn.com)
• Brits to spend over seven million online this year (shoppingdivas.com)
• Online shopping demand troubles frustrate Yule shoppers (customerthink.com)

hanging out at the knowledge center

Sitting in the University of Nevada‘s  library knowledge center for the last time as a graduate student feels good. Everything I have worked for has come to a head. I wait impatiently (patience has never been a strong point for me) for my last final to begin tonight. Let me take a trip down memory lane as I reminisce about the past few years…

let’s take a trip back in time together to 1985

I am one of those people who went to college right after high school only to find myself unfocused and unprepared to commit to an education. After two years in school, my future seemed nebulous as I got married at age 20 (yeah I know it is young) started a new life as an entrepreneur, then a mom, single parent, newly remarried, etc, etc.

Fast forward 20 years to 2005 (sound effects should be beeping as we travel in time) First, where did all the time go? I don’t feel that much older. While I was skating through life, my husband completed his MBA and passed all the CPA exams. His accomplishments were amazing. He was amazing.

Yet for all of the admiration, I was bitter that I never finished college. Not completing a degree felt like I was missing something big. As one chapter in life closed (Formals Bridal), another was opening (Miriam Gomberg; student) right in front of me. Rather than sulking or hanging out at the gym, Robert sent me back to school to finish the education I left incomplete 20 years earlier.

In 3 years I had a BS in health science. Did I just do that? Now I was amazing too. I cried like a baby during the graduation ceremony. This was a colossal accomplishments. One problem was that I graduated in 2008 right as the economy was falling apart. Better to stay in school and keep going. After all, if I didn’t continue while in the mode, I probably wouldn’t ever go back again.

what did I get myself into?

Enter the MBA program at UNR. I was fortunate enough to be accepted into the program after taking the GMAT 3 times (yeah, I felt dumb too). The difference was that not only was I a wife, mom and student, but a full time retail manager as well.

It was expected for students to work in the field, but in retail, there is no office in which to do homework during off-times. Long stretches of time are spent on your feet and the hours can be crazy as well. This was to be a bigger challenge than earlier expected.

girls in hoods

Yay! I’m done!!

December 10, 2011 was graduation. It was exhilarating putting on the cap, gown and hood. Funny I didn’t cry at all during this graduation. The past few weeks have been unbearable in that I suffered from an acute case of senioritis.

I always prided myself in the quality of work I presented while in school. College is a privilege, that I did not take for granted. There are not many people who are allowed the chance to return to school after a 20 year hiatus.

lesson learned: I can do anything (with perseverance of course)

A substantial lesson I hope to pass on from this is what it takes to complete something as important as higher education. There were sacrifices I made, along with family and friends in order to make the dream a reality. My children saw how hard I worked for the past several years and that even when I would complain, I never gave up as It was never an option.

So where do I go from here? Which path should I take? At this point, my future is still cloudy. There are no guarantees that people (employers, etc.) will find my  education or services valuable. Just because I graduated, does not mean I will discover a dream career right away. It is all part of the journey, and it fulfilled a personal need to grow. What else could I possibly ask for?

Related articles

• Foreign Enrollment Surges at U.S. B-Schools (businessweek.com)
• Is MBA your ticket to a bright future? (rolipolli.wordpress.com)
• I’m getting an MBA? (travellearnlove.wordpress.com)

Life is pretty crazy right now. Working 40 hours and being a mom of two and wife of one is more than enough for most people. However, I like to ride with my hair on fire, so I added graduate school (MBA complete December 2011) and buying new house to top it all off.

Lately there is so much happening at once, I find myself becoming fragmented. It all seems so important that I don’t know where to start. Where do I focus my attention? What priorities should I have? I want to find joy in life, but where is the joy and how do I uncover it? How do I slow it all down?

Take a deep Bbreath

Today I practiced a visualization technique learned through The Inner Edge Book Club in order to understand my personal vision. For 20 minutes, I laid down on my bed, closed my eyes and envisioned an ideal future. Simply getting out of my head for 20 minutes was a feat in itself. I gained great insight through this visualization; some already known, some not yet discovered.

What do I want? What do I see?

 OK, what now?

Next week’s Book Club discusses choosing areas of focus and priorities. Once I am better able to define what I want to achieve, I will be able to find a path to get there. So far it is slow going for me in completing the vision, but I find myself getting closer each day.

One thing I realized it is OK not to know exactly what I want right now. I am learning the art of meaningful action; when to say yes or no. In mapping out the future, I need to simplify things and weed out noise, which is hard to do when a 5-month old puppy is destroying things while I type.

Lesson learned learning: there will always be noise

With inevitable noise, comes choices as to how it affects me. Items such as school, work, kids, puppy, the new Twilight movie, continue no matter what. Will any of them ultimately affect the goal for success? The objective is to learn which ones will and quiet down the rest.

For now, my focus is on finishing the semester and finally graduating. After graduation it will be time to review and refine my vision of success. By taking one thing off the list, it will become more manageable. The rest will have to wait for now.

Related articles

• an overwhelming feeling of dread (miriamgomberg.wordpress.com)
• Why did you study MBA (wiki.answers.com)
• Should You Go to Graduate School? (onlinecollege.org)

Last week, I had an expensive lesson in service when I killed my new laptop computer. It started as an ordinary morning with my marketing group at Starbucks. We were working on a presentation due the next week.

All five of us were gathered around a table, sipping coffee and tapping away on our computers; no big whoop.Tap, sip, tap, sip until batteries were mostly drained After 30 minutes, we switched tables so that we could all plug in our chargers and re-gathered our stuff.

This is where everything slowed down and sped up simultaneously, as I reached for my still hot venti coffee with soy milk. Inadvertantly, I knocked the cup over sideways, spilling the cup’s contents both across my lap and my laptop keyboard.

Somebody get me a towel!!

Completely in shock, I shot out of my seat, asking the barista for a towel to try to save the laptop. The barista not only tossed me a towel as soon as I said something, but he arrived within moments at our table toting several more towels and a mop to clean up the floor.

He was apologetic as he helped me sop up the hot mess in the hopes that I would remain calm. I was unusually zen-like (not me at all) when I reassured him that it would be ok because I purchased AppleCare with my laptop 4 months earlier (yup, it was that new). It should all be covered under the plan. After drying myself off, I headed over to the local Apple store with my coffee-ridden laptop in tow.

There is no care like AppleCare

With my pants still damp and smelling of coffee, I entered the Apple store and found the nearest associate, handed him the wet computer and alerted him as to what happened. The next available genius appointment was not for another day, so he took the piece into the back to see if there was anything that could be saved.

After roughly 10 minutes in the back, he re-emerged and told me the bad news, I killed my precious laptop and the only thing now would be to replace everything inside leaving only the original shell for $750. My heart sank and I felt slightly indignant about the outcome.

What, what, what?

What about the insurance bought through them? Why did I pay extra for AppleCare when it was no use to me now? Was this really happening? Suddenly, my calm exterior gave way and I did what I do best; started crying. Turns out that AppleCare only covers manufacturers defects and has nothing to do with morons who pour hot coffee (with soy) on their keyboards. Well, they didn’t call me a moron, but I felt like one all the same.

Once I stopped the water-works, I realized that I had no choice. I couldn’t replace the darn thing for $750 so I was stuck (note how precious laptop became darn thing in an instant). I signed my life away and was promised it would be back in 3 to 5 business days.

Lesson learned; it is not Apple’s fault I was a moron.

 I realized, while bawling, that it was not Apple’s fault I had fumble fingers. What from that incident entitles me to a new free laptop or discounted/free repairs? had I read the fine print when purchasing AppleCare? Of course not! No amount of tears was going to remedy my error. In reality it could have hurt my chances of receiving good service.

Being a difficult customer does not always get you what you want. Sales/customer service associates are there to assist if you have problems, but if you become a crying raging lunatic, you forfeit the priveledge of good service. Believe me, no one likes helping those who feel entitled.

For now, I use an old laptop that belongs to my 13-year old. We have parental restrictions set, so I can’t visit my regular sites (I feel so juvenile). The battery doesn’t hold a charge and the track pad is broken, but it is still functioning. It could have been worse. I could have spilled coffee on someone else’s computer and have to pay to fix theirs. Lesson learned; drink coffee with a screw cap when on the computer.