What do you do, when you don’t know what to say? Is it better to wait patiently for someone else to break the tension, or start babbling just to stop the silence from continuing? Do you enjoy the sound of your own voice more than anyone else? If you suffer from these or other various symptoms, you probably have a case of talking out of your ass.
The Urban Dictionary defines talking out of your ass as:
Words produced from a man that does not know what he is talking about. Often in an attempt to offer assistance with some type of problem or dilemma. The dialog usually is nonsensical and is of no help. It is often just made up bullshit with no basis in fact.
Recently I was at a friend’s party sipping a glass of Pinot laughing and talking with other guests when this new guy (don’t even remember his name, so I will call him Buddy) entered the room and joined in. (insert suspense music here)
Hey, I love meeting and chatting with new people, but Buddy had a way of clearing a room. What is it with some people who think they have to know something about everything?
No matter the topic, Buddy had a comment or two ready. Maybe he was a real-life renaissance man? I never believed (and still don’t) that one person could be an expert in so many subjects.
proceed talking out of your ass
Time stood still as I listened to Buddy and his rantings about:
- Male Models
- Female Models
- The perils of quitting smoking while pregnant
I’m sure there was more, but at some point, I stopped listening. I fought the urge to shout out one-word topics just to see what he would say. My friend and I began texting back and forth while sitting next to one another questioning if he would ever stop. BTW, I know it is rude to text while at a party, but the situation was way too funny not to share with her.
lesson learned: sometimes it is OK to say nothing
Buddy did not appear eloquent or even the least bit intelligent. I couldn’t wait to get away from him and his nonsense. Buddy was probably harmless, and may have even been a nice guy to know, but I could not get past the rabid ass-talking.
If he wanted to impress me with his knowledge and/or witty conversational abilities, Buddy should have stopped trying so hard. Inauthentic ass-talking is a major turn off.
How would you react to someone talking out of his ass? Share your stories or helpful hints. You need not be an expert in everything to reply.